Yesterday I had one of those moments that got me thinking (their really rare so they stick with me). Life is hard. Challenges are a daily part of everything we do. Sometimes I feel like giving up or at the very least wish I could hire Alice from the Brady Bunch to help out. So here's my thought... Life is full of difficulties, we are always climbing the mountain and it seems like we hardly ever get to the top and get to appreciate the view. I thought of a few times I got the "view" and then it was OK....
#1 Yesterday I got to hear my baby's heartbeat for the first time. The last few months have been an experiment in torture for me. I have never been more sick, never been more miserable in my life. I had begun to think of this little one as a life sucking creature. Yesterday I got to hear that little baby and then it was OK.
#2 In high school I dated this cutest boy for over a year. Then he left to serve a mission for two long years. I was 16 and incredibly dramatic, so though I knew he was doing the right thing I was so depressed. Then the depression went away and a I dated a little bit, one of whom I thought might be "the one". However, it never worked out because I just couldn't "Dear John" Lyndon, I even chased the mailman down once to get one back. Then he came home. It was awkward and weird but that first night he asked if he could kiss me and I said yes and I swear their were fireworks and then it was OK.
#3 We knew we were supposed to adopt and eagerly got started on the process. Then became what adoption is really all about...waiting. We waited and waited and worried and worried. I became so insane I needed meds (my adoption friends continually suggested different ones for me to take), but never did. It was the most heart wrenching thing I have ever done and I never felt more alone. But then many, many months later on Christmas Eve this angel boy sat on my lap with a bow on his head and then it was OK.
There are lots more. But, I think I am beginning to see that life is a series of bumps, bruises, long runs (though I kind of like those) and climbs with an occasional glimpse of the view and then it will be OK. Hopefully someday I will stand next to my Savior all broken up but having tried my hardest and He will give me a hug and then it will be OK...
