Thursday, January 7, 2010

Yes the whole world revolves around me...


I had made a decision not to blog until I felt better, didn't want to whine and complain in print. However, my new thought is that if I blog about it I won't feel a need to whine incessantly to any one who will listen. I am going to see if it works and if it stops me from being all about me to the next handful of people that are nice enough to ask how I am doing, then you won't want to read this for awhile. So how am I you ask (not that you asked, but for the sake of argument let's pretend the whole world really does revolve around me)? You know how I love lists so let me give you top 10 reasons why I am not OK...
#10 having been ill for nearly two months now there is nothing left in any grocery store anywhere that hasn't made me me sick and so therefore I can't eat it again...
#9 my son said that he loved me because I used to take care of him, but now that dad does it he likes my hair
#8 reading makes me dizzy, that's right my favorite past time can't happen
#7 running keeps me sane, unless you count running to the bathroom then you can imagine just how sane I am
#6 the track marks and bruises up my arms from the hospital make me look like a druggie
#5 though I appreciate the sometimes 5 pounds I lose in a day, bulimia apparently isn't going to work for me
#4 an allergic reaction to an IV drug at the hospital turned me into an embarrasing raving lunatic threatining to rip my IV out, my poor sister stood in the hallway waiting for the nurse because she was to afraid to be with me
#3 I haven't gotten dressed in a month and my adorable husband probably is starting to think the women at work look kind of cute (note my husband works construction and for the most part he has NEVER seen a girl at work that he would have noticed wasn't a guy)
#2 I have little to no participation in my life...it happens without me and I am to sick to even notice most of the time.
#1 you never know how much your family needs you until you are right here and can't do anything for them. I see all of them suffering because of me, me, me and it breaks my heart into a million pieces...
So big thanks to my sweet friends and family who call and ask how I am doing and then endure my tearful whining. Big thanks to those who have brought food (or offered to do so), cough drops, herbal remedies and groceries. Huge thanks to those who have offered to take my kids if I need them to. Big thanks to my darling sister who endured one of the most difficult nights I can remember by my side. Did I mention I know how blessed I am and I really love this little creature? I do and I know this to shall pass, I just wish it would pass a little quicker...

9 comments:

TORi said...

I hope things get better for you! I'm sorry you are sick and can't exactly be there for you! But you are really awesome Heather! You are Super Mom! You can do it all!

Jess said...

I am sorry you are so sick. Does it usually let up, or does it last the entire pregnancy? I wish I had some words of advice or encouragement, but I'm sure they wouldn't be anything you haven't heard before. You can whine all you want, it is your blog afterall!

p.s have you tried audio books? I listen to them on my ipod. you should give 'em a try.

Piper said...

Good luck! Let me know if there is anything I can do (I know it's a silly question coming all the way from Logan, but hey).

I hate to say this, but I'm pretty sure hearing pregnant women talk convinces me I don't want any biological children.

Also, I know you. You can do anything, and you're buff.

Emily said...

Congratulations to you guys. So exciting to be expecting, though the whole pregnancy thing is for the dogs. I'm sorry you are so sick. I feel so bad for you. I hope it passes soon. You are a trooper and you still make me laugh, even if you are on what feels like your death bed.

Perla said...

oh dear friend...being ill is so terrible...i'd love some more details about what happened with the allergic reaction. what was that about???
and #9 made me laugh out loud. thanks for being so funny even when feeling so not!

Perla said...

by the way, what is your due date???

Tevita and Jodi said...

I must be emotional today because as I read your blog I cried. This brought back so many yucky memories for me and I am so so sorry that you are going through this. Not the baby part, just the barfing part. Hang in there and on that day that is circled on your calendar I think we should go celebrate!!:) Let me know if you need anything, even just a shoulder to cry on. Love ya

Laura said...

You mean the cough drops didn't help? Well, I guess I will just have to bring you one of those little pet beds so you can at least lie down in comfort on your bathroom floor.

Lisa said...

I'm so excited about you guys having another baby! But it breaks my heart that you're suffering so much! I'm so sorry! I wish I lived closer!
I can't stop thinking about you and your Haitian friends with this horrible earthquake. Do you know anything about any of your friends over there? I can't imagine the heartache you're feeling, on top of being so physically ill right now. Big hugs from me.

Guess what? I'm due in July... ; )