Phase Two-Big Hole In Ground

Hello to you all. I am home from Haiti and have been writing what I want to say in my head. However, I just feel like mere words cannot tell about my trip. I am trying to channel Charles Dickens so that it can be said with the poetic beauty that explains my week...Anyway while, "it was the best of times it was the worst of times" certainly sums it up I have so much more I want to say. So while I keep writing in my head, trying to find my floor and rid my laundry room of the essence of Haiti smell I thought I would take a minute to post "house news". The picture is of the hole that appeared in my land while I was away. They tell me this is good news and that in the not to distant future the hole will fill in to be my home. I had a little "laugh"/sick feeling to myself when I realized that with a hole, dumpster and port a potty on my land that I already have it better than most of my dear friends in Haiti....

Two Things That Hit Me Like A Ton Of Bricks

A few posts ago I wrote about losing myself and being completely content in that. I really felt that way too, I felt like giving myself completely to my family was the way to go. While I believe with all of my heart that most of my focus should be there something happened along the way. The well of reserves dried up and what I was giving started to be no good. You have to take a bit of time to fill the well. So my husband bought me a treadmill (thank you sweetie) and I started taking the time to use it each morning. I have put it on my to do list to spend some time with my scriptures and don't start the day off without a prayer even if I have to say it with a toddler on my head. I have forced myself to get out of my pj's each morning and have even put make up on three days in a row. I am amazed at how much better I feel and how much more I have to give to my kids even taking time for just these few things. I also took the afternoon off from schooling yesterday so I could really clean and organize my home. While I believe I was spending way to much time cleaning before I certainly let it go way to far the other direction there for awhile! Anyway, here's to filling the well so I have more to give to those that need it.
Also, on another topic. I have taught young women, primary kids, Sunday school kids and my own kids for years. We tell them to "choose the right". We tell them to walk away if they are in a situation they should not be in. Last night I was so excited to be invited to hang out with some girl friends. I thought this would be good for filling the well and let's face it I have been desperate for friendship lately (I even made up an imaginary friend that I took running with me the other night), anyway now that you know just how nuts I am I will get to the point. I loved visiting with these friends. I wasn't thrilled when I heard what they had rented to watch, but these are good women so I thought maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Three minutes in I knew I needed to leave. It took me another 30 minutes to get up the courage to actually do it. It is hard to make right choices. It's even hard for not cool, mother of five me to do it. Imagine how our kids feel trying to make the right choice when friends mean so much to them. Anyway, just one of those things that is easier said than done.
I won't be blogging for a couple of weeks. Kyle and I are off to Haiti on Saturday. I look forward to sharing the trip with all of you when I get back!

A Big Shot Of Hope

Thanks all of you for joining me for my pity party recently. My phone friends have listened to me whine, my blog pals have read it in print and my dear family has suffered through a mother speaking the ancient language, "Whinese". How grateful I am for the shot of hope delivered to me this weekend by participating in general conference. I have been given a much needed attitude adjustment. I was especially grateful for President Monson's talk this morning. He reminds us that one day I will miss the piles of laundry and toys that I will trip over. Mother's who are out of this stage tell me this all of the time, but I mutter under my breath about these well meaning women, "if you miss it so much I would be happy to drop over a handful of screaming toddlers at any time!" Funny how when it is coming from the prophet of God I take it to heart much better! I quote president Monson, "Never let a problem to be solved take precedence over a person to be loved." This has been my attitude to much as of late, "go away little boy, can't you see I am trying to make your life run smoother." Here's to me keeping the adjustement given to me this weekend. I am also grateful for the follwing things from conference that I want to keep with me:
-Despair is something Satan uses, not God
-Part of our victory as disciples of Christ is how we handle times when we are overwhelmed or discouraged
-Take heart, have faith and the Lord will fight our battles, our children's battles and our children's childrens' battles.
Life will not be any less difficult after this weekend for you or for me. However, with the right attitidue and with the Lord on our side there is nothing we cannot do. We can also be blessed to have joy while living it.